"God made everything beautiful in itself and in its time"- Ecclesiastes 3:11
She would love for it to happen now: the butterflies, the late night talks that travel well into the early morning and of course, the wonderful reassurance of knowing that someone will hold her hand no matter how dark or sunny it is out.
"It's not a priority," whispers her head firmly to her heart and her heart that has been hiding in the depths of my soul for so long agrees-- still too weak from past bruising to argue.
The heart knows it wasn't time and in due time, when the stars are right and God says yes, everything else will fall into place.
But the heart wishes to say something to the one God has prepared for her.
Although she has never seen him, never touched his hand and never shared a conversation with him, she knows his heart as well as she knows her own.
She was familiar to him in so many ways and yet so strange-- what did his laughter sound like? What was it like to spend Saturdays with him? Did he love God as much as she did?
Was he praying for her the way she was praying for him?
Or was he spending every Saturday night with a different girl, she shudders at the thought-- often left wondering if there would be a piece of him left for her when they finally meet in God's appointed time.
But she knew that no matter what, if they were meant by Him, none of the others would be significant.
Every morning she walks out of the door wondering if that was the day and sleeps with hope knowing that she was closer to meeting him every time she wakes up.
Her days are lost in a rush-- doing the things that she is passionate about and she admits that on most days, she forgets about him or at least tries to, often wondering if he really was out there or he was a dream that would never be realized. On days as such, she clings tighter to the promise of God.
Her common sense tells her that she is not yet ready and that if she met him now, everything will unravel simply because the time is not yet appointed for them, there are a lot of adventures to go to, a lot of stories to write and a whole lot of self to build.
She is not yet completely whole and she knew that she doesn't have much to offer him yet
She needs to be completely sold out to the Lover of her Soul and that was the best that she could offer him. She was not a beauty queen or one of those models that surround him, but she trusted God knowing that whatever He has planned from the beginning will come to pass in His time.
That God did not need her foolish schemes. That when it came to the matters of the heart, God did not need to be told what to do. He just needs her to trust completely in His timing and in due time, she will see how He has arranged everything from beginning to end.
She couldn't help but rest in the promise that even before they were born-- their story was already written.
It maybe taking awhile, but she knows they'll get there in time and for now, the best that she could do is pray and rest in the love that has been graciously given to her.
And soon, she'll turn a corner and the dominoes will fall into place one by one.
Until then...her heart rests, waiting expectantly.